Pleasures and pains go side by side. Every coin has two sides. The day is followed by night and winters by summers. Everything attracts its opposite and the cycle of nature goes on moving. Nothing remains stationary in this world. Change is the secret which sustains life. Changes may be positive or negative and we have to bear both with a bowed head as there is no escape.
The pains of retired life is a mix of crunches of both retired life and of old age because incidentally, the retirement generally happens at a comparatively advanced stage of the age. The pleasures and sense of freedom one can enjoy under certain circumstances is already discussed in the previous blog published on 9th Feb,2018. The pains of retired life/old age can be :-
- Health issues of self and that of the spouse.
- Change in attitude of associates, relatives, and friends towards you.
- No pension or inadequate pension to meet day to day needs.
- No one to take care in case of an emergency.
- Pending family settlements and liabilities.
- Children not suitably settled.
- Depression because there is no work to substantiate abundant free time.
The only solution to all these problems is to live to the will of Lord and change your own attitude towards life. We are not the masters of everything and might not be destined to finish every so-called liability during our lifetime. There is always something pending for others to complete or accomplish.
Life is full of struggles from day one until the end. We did struggle to speak, sit, crawl, and walk when we were infants. Struggle for learning, understanding various fields and activities kept us engaged throughout our school to college and university days. We further intensified our struggle to build our careers. And now at this old age, Can we avoid making struggles? We have to continue struggling until the end with a Positive Mental Attitude.
The sufferings and pains are part of life for all of us. Health issues are a cause for concern especially at the old age when many vital organs get fatigued, become weak and can’t give the required output to keep our body healthy. Our body is a very complicated machine and consists of thousands of working parts and millions of cells. These have been working tirelessly for so many years. Parts of any machine do get worn out and need replacement, which in case of the human body are a very costly affair and in some cases not possible. We have to bear with this, as there is no other way out. It is advisable to get medical insurance done in order to take care of heavy expenses in case of an emergency.
After one is out of power he should not expect his associates, relatives, and friends to flock him the way they were doing when he was in power. Our relationships of all types are because of some need or dependence which is a bitter truth. Once that need is fulfilled or we lose the capacity to meet people’s needs, they will start disassociating from us, in the same manner, we did with our associates, relatives, and friends when they lost power or capacity to help us. Needs and interests are the basis of many relationships with few exceptions. Who will then come to our rescue in such state of affairs in this world? Only Lord is our hope. He loves us more than anybody else and that too without any expectations from us. SO CHANGE YOUR ATTITUDE, DO NOT CARRY BAGGAGE, FACE THE SITUATION WITH POSITIVE MINDSET, AND LEAVE EVERYTHING TO THE WILL OF LORD. Unnecessarily taking these things seriously will only make you more uncomfortable leading to Stress or Depression. Ignore people who ignore you and stop bothering about them.
You must make financial arrangements for the rainy days of your life while in active service/job. You are bound to suffer humiliation in case you don’t have regular and adequate resources to meet your needs. Stay with your children or relatives if you can manage or go to an old age home. All of us have to bear our KARMAS; no escape. Your children or close relative may not be able to devote more time to you because of their own compulsions. Stay calm and contended and thank GOD that at least they are with you.
Settle your liabilities well in time otherwise, you will remain worrying when you will become unable to settle them. You can’t make hay when the sun is not shining. Try your best to settle your children well in time. However, if you could not do, don’t worry as your worry will not help. It will only add more wrinkles to your face and help you to increase your stress, blood pressure, and depression. You played your inning well and now it is their turn to earn and take care of you.
Please understand that all of us have to pass through pleasures and pains while we are in this human body. We have to bear our own Cross as this world is run by one universal principle ‘AS YOU SO, SO SHALL YOU REAP’. When Lord Rama, Lord Krishna, Hazrat Mohammad Sahib(PBUH), Guru Nanak Dev Ji and other Gurus suffered and fought battles with the evil, how can you be an exception? During the battle of Mahabharat Pandavas fought with their own brothers; The Kauravas. This signifies that the evil is within us and we have to fight it within. Arjun the great warrior surrendered to Lord Krishna and gave the reins of his chariot to Him and shot arrows in the direction Lord Krishna moved the chariot. Have we ever surrendered control of the chariot of our life to Lord and fought the battle of life ourselves? Instead, we hold the reins in our hands and want the Lord to fight for us. This will not work. We have to live up to His will and remain satisfied because both pains and pleasures come with His will.
The Fifth Sikh Guru, Guru Arjan Dev Ji Maharaj, was being tortured by making him sit on the hot iron plate and boiling water was poured on his head and before being martyred, you know what he said? “Tera bhana meetha lage”, Means “Oh my Lord All this is happening with your will and your will is sweet to me”.
When Jesus Christ was mercilessly tortured before being crucified, He prayed to GOD and said,”O GOD forgive them because they don’t know what they are doing”. This is the level of tolerance that is expected for attaining peace and tranquility.
So, remain contended in whatever circumstances the Lord keeps you. He will always give us what is to our benefit; a chocolate or a bitter medicine. He knows well, so don’t fear or worry even about your death. You don’t have much time at your disposal so live to the hour. No time to worry. Keep on doing good and remain happy. Let God worry about you.